God, it was dreary...

Cindy McCain watched with the look of someone who had invested millions into this project, and the truth is that she has. Even he seemed to acknowledge this when he spoke of accepting "a rare privilege offered to few Americans" as he accepted the nomination and said of her, "She is more my inspiration than I am hers."

I couldn't help but feel that I was watching a pact that had been made, long ago, suddenly come to fruition.

He started oddly, thanking Bush "for leading us in those dark days following the worst attack on American soil in our history", and - in an election that has been defined as concerning the future - it struck me as a strange lurch back to the language of the last election.

It was a realisation of how much Obama's positivity has redefined the argument, how the language of fear no longer held the sway which had allowed Bush and his gang to ride it to a second term.

Instead, McCain was forced to embrace this new positivity and say of Obama, "Despite our differences, much more unites us than divides us". Again, it sounded like McCain was trying to steal Obama's clothes, that this man who has engaged in appalling negativity realised that the language had changed and that he too had to adjust. It was a clunky adjustment, like an elderly relative working his way through the gears of an old car.

But that was to define the parameters of the speech. McCain was seeking to usurp Obama and present himself as the agent of change.

The first time he genuinely lit up the hall was when, eleven minutes in, two protesters were removed from the hall screaming, a reminder that he is a supporter of a terribly unpopular war, and he remarked, "Please don't be diverted by the ground noise and the static". The audience went wild. But within that wild response was the feeling that this is a mindset which feels itself under siege, this is a group of people who don't like or understand the changes which swirl around them.

Quite how picked upon they feel was best illustrated when McCain said, "I’ve found just the right partner to help me shake up Washington, Governor Sarah Palin of Alaska" and the audience erupted in joy for this woman that, one week ago, few of them could have named. She has become their talisman. Their proof that the big bad media have it in for them.

Palin herself had a look on her face which seemed to sum up where the entire conservative movement now finds itself. Terribly pleased with oneself and yet terribly confused as to why others don't appear to share your joy. She really is their poster child.

He then, in a moment which made me laugh out loud, said: "But I can’t wait until I introduce her to Washington. And let me offer an advance warning to the old, big spending, do nothing, me first, country second Washington crowd: change is coming." It's as if he hadn't been a member of this group for the last 26 years, as if the Republicans hadn't been in power for the last eight years. He's literally offering change by offering more of the same.

He appears to think that, by offering a younger exponent of the same old crap, that it's suddenly not crap anymore.

And then, the man famous for being part of the Keating Five, stated:

I’ve fought corruption, and it didn’t matter if the culprits were Democrats or Republicans. They violated their public trust, and had to be held accountable.

And suddenly one realises that this isn't politics anymore, this is theatre. This is John McCain the media construct, the manufactured hero. This is what Cindy's millions have helped to sellotape together; a world where you can make any claim, however outrageous, and lambaste the honour of anyone who challenges you. Where you can offer as Vice President a woman who no-one has ever heard of and then attack as "sexist" anyone who questions your judgement.

He, inevitably, turned to his time as a POW but to be honest I had tuned out by then. He really is a dreadful public speaker, having on this occasion been upstaged by the lady from Alaska last night.

His message, and I'm complimenting it by referring to it as such, is that he is the agent of change, he is the man who can transform Washington. All we have to do is ignore the fact that he has been part of it for 26 years, close our eyes and wish very, very, hard.

It wasn't just a bad speech, it was dreary.

Cindy dutifully watched and clapped. But one couldn't help but feel that she has wasted her millions on a flawed product that is never going to sell.

UPDATE:



Here's the entire speech. Full marks to anyone who can sit through the full thing. I couldn't. I ended up simply reading the transcript such was the dreadfulness of the delivery.

Click title for transcript.

Tags: McCain, Obama, US election 2008